Lucifer season 5 squee/rant (SPOILERS)

[firecat]

SPOILERS


More or less in order of appearance:

PLUS:

• Mr Said Out Bitch
  
• I wanted more of the Maze/Chloe partnership. In both senses of the word.
  
• End of ep 1, the way they teased about whether Lucifer was having a fantasy or what was happening between !Lucifer and Chloe on Earth was real
  
• Any time Tom Ellis wears fewer clothes than usual
  
• Tom Ellis's hair when it's not Lucifer's perfect coif
  
• The funny physical differences they came up with for Michael vs. Lucifer. Michael's clothes get rumpled. He holds his glass by the bottom. The soles of his shoes are black. Etc.
  
• Watching Ellis try to play an American, because he slips back into an English accent or Lucifer body language when he is playing intense emotions. He gets better at it, but still doesn't master it by ep 8.
  
• Stealth Sharon Osbourne
  
• Lieutenant ¡Diablo! - don’t tell HIM the Devil made you do it. The writers getting to make fun of writing a TV show. (Although there was too much of the bad show portrayed.)
  
• LESLEY-ANN BRANDT SINGING "I WANNA BE EVIL" and her duet with Tom Ellis.
  
• Tricia Helfer playing a character I like for once.
  
• "I've seen Kafka's Hell loop."
  
• "Ferget it, Trix. It's Chinatown"
  
• Fierce, action-star Amenadiel
  
• Fierce, action-star Amenadiel making out with Maze
  
• Amenadiel attracting nuns
  
• Amenadiel being a detective
  
• The show finally making a point (more than once) of mentioning that Lucifer attracts/is attracted to people other than women. (Would rather they showed it, but I'll take what I can get.)
  
• Lucifer playing with his Devil face to amuse Charlie (although why he's doing it when he's visible through a huge picture window, I don't know).
  
• Fanservice: Ella saying "DeckerStar" and making fun of how it's taken forever for Lucifer and Chloe to fuck. Ella and Pete speaking Klingon to each other.
  
• Lucifer/Ella as a detective team

AMBIVALENT

• The Maze arc. I like that Lesley-Ann Brandt gets more to do, but I wish she had more character development. Other characters get happy moments occasionally but with Maze it's just full-on emotional torture all the time.
  
• DeckerStar. I have never shipped them even though I know it's canon, and I was dreading this season because I thought it would be all DeckerStar all the time. But it wasn't, and I was fine with the scenes where they were back in their friendly bantering role but with a smooch thrown in now and then. But there's just way too much angst that's driven by the characters being super emotionally fragile and irrational. (Which was also true in other seasons, but it's worse in this one.) I don't headcanon Lucifer as having an emotional IQ equal to his waist size, but one could at least make an argument for why he acts that way so often. But why does Chloe act that way so often? Episode 6 "BlueBallz" is particularly fired for this.
  
• Lucifer's powers keep changing / Chloe gets his powers. They come up with a reasonable explanation for his powers changing (except see below) but I didn't like the whiplash of wondering in every episode which ones he has and doesn't have.

MINUS

• Trixie is no longer cute in the same way. (Not the fault of Scarlett Estevez for growing up, and she's still a great actress.)
  
• I hate Dan's self-actualizing thing
  
• I hate Linda's helicopter-parenting thing. I dislike the whole Linda/Amenadiel parenting subplot.
  
• Maze coming on to Chloe: Hated Chloe's reason for refusing: “no, because we are using this partnership to fill a void” implying that of course women are not complete without men.
  
• Michael, starting in Ep 3. "Oh fuck, he's going to be in the whole season, isn't he." (To cut some slack, I've had this reaction to almost every single villain in the series, but usually appreciated them more the second-third time around.)
  
• When the nun kisses Amenadiel, they're trying to get additional humiliation laughs out of it by making her not conventionally attractive.
  
• Soulmates. Just, NO
  
• Having a little jealousy/possessiveness between Lucifer and Chloe is OK, but it's way over the top.
  
• Serial killers. I hate serial killers.
  
• Dan shooting Lucifer
  
• Every time Chloe runs toward injured Lucifer instead of away (in the eps where he is vulnerable to physical damage around her)
  
• THE STUPID FUCKING IDEA THAT BEING EMOTIONALLY AVAILABLE IN A LOVING RELATIONSHIP WITH SOMEONE ELSE MEANS NOT BEING ABLE TO DO WHAT YOU CAN USUALLY DO, AND IF YOU CAN, IT MEANS YOU DON'T LOVE THE PERSON
  
• Pete being the serial killer. COULD YOU HAVE MADE IT ANY MORE OBVIOUS, WRITERS? Only if he'd been wearing a Hannibal T-shirt or something. I was screaming at the screen "PLEASE SUBVERT IT PLEASE SUBVERT IT". But NOOOO.
  
• MAKING A HUGE BIG DEAL OUT OF THE WORDS 'I LOVE YOU'.

OH PLEEZ OH PLEEZ

• Can we PLEEZ have polyam Amenadiel/Maze/Linda. FOR REAL STOP TEASING

WORLDBUILDING

• The whole “Hell is people living out their guilt in a loop” doesn’t work for me because the worst ppl don’t have consciences, and it means ordinary people would be stuck in loops around something completely innocent they said when they were seven.