Date: 5 Jun 2002 10:11 am (UTC)
I'm not sure about a graduate, but I've seen the same thing often enough to come to some conclusions...

I've seen people who can strike up a pleasant, intelligent conversation with anyone. (As distinguished from some bubblehead who will just chatter at someone.) I've seen people who can sometimes get a conversation started, but sometimes fail. I've seen people who just fold into themselves and look lost.

For the most part, I think I see two things. How much self-confidence does someone have? How good is that person at figuring out the right questions to ask to pull their conversational partner out of his/her shell?

I'm fairly good at the first, but I still have a lot of difficulty with the second.

And a third point just occured to me. How interested are you in the people around you? (Rhetorical you.) If one displays an honest interest in what their conversational partner is saying, that partner is encouraged to continue talking. I'm spotty at this. I don't fake this kind of interest well.

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firecat (attention machine in need of calibration)

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