The object of the social game

[firecat]

If you think the object of the social game is to "never bother anyone" or "have everyone like you," then for sure it isn't fair or winnable. Not by anyone. But if the object of the game is to "find a few people you get along with," then it's winnable because you don't end up losing if you happen to bother some people.

Another goal to play the social game for might be "Develop the ability to get along with more people." Yet another goal to play for might be "Understand all the ways people can be different, so that if someone gets bothered, you have a better idea of why."

So which goals are you playing for?

Comments

[rosefox]

I don't really tend to think of socializing as a game, though I suppose anything can be thought of that way. It certainly isn't zero-sum. My goals in interacting with other people are:

* Learn new things.
* Be reminded that there are people out there who are not like me (this is a huge issue for me, so I try to arrange for pretty constant reminders).
* Something indefinable about finding people I can love and what a privilege it is to love someone and feel the joy of loving that person, with each joy and each love being different and exquisite.
* Something equally indefinable about feeling other people's love for or appreciation of me or something I do/can do/have done.
* Find things that make me happy or make me laugh or make me think that I could never have come up with alone or gotten from reading material, that required the give-and-take of interaction.

I think the social game needs a provision where you can, if necessary, roll to disbelieve. *)