Elizabeth M. Jones May 1921 - 6 February 2011

[firecat]

So come, my friends, be not afraid.
We are so lightly here.
It is in love that we are made;
In love we disappear.
-- Leonard Cohen & Sharon Robinson, "Boogie Street"

I got the call from the hospice nurse around 6:30. Dad and I went over for a final goodbye. Mom looked as if she had died peacefully.

Comments

[johnpalmer.livejournal.com]

My deepest sympathies. Please, take good care of yourself.

One thing that I never expected when my own mom died was how suddenly present she became for me. It was a bit scary in some ways - how I'd suddenly want to tell mom about X. It could have been a bit guilt inducing - I didn't let it be (or rather, wouldn't agree with any guilt-stabs my brain tried to make against me).

[firecat]

Thank you for your comfort and for sharing your experience.

May I ask why it was guilt-inducing when you wanted to tell mom about X?

[johnpalmer.livejournal.com]

Well, my mom and I lived far apart, and I didn't call as often as I might have. So, things I'd like to tell her could come with a flash of "well, maybe if you'd called her more often..." or somesuch.

[firecat]

Oh, I see.

I know I will feel something like that too even though I spent a lot of time with my parents in my Mom's last decade. Mom and I loved each other a lot but in many ways we didn't really "get" each other. And she was a very private person. So there's a lot of stuff I wish we could have shared but we couldn't.