Gender query: Self-consciousness of image

[firecat]

I read a blog called The Beheld.

In this post, "Recommended Reading," Autumn Whitefield-Madrano discusses Naomi Wolf's The Beauty Myth and recommends some books that "go beyond" and "work alongside" Wolf's book. One of them is Ways of Seeing by John Berger. Whitefield-Madrano includes the following quote from the book:

A woman must continually watch herself. She is almost continually accompanied by her own image of herself. Whilst she is walking across a room or whilst she is weeping at the death of her father, she can scarcely avoid envisaging herself walking or weeping. … And so she comes to consider the surveyor and the surveyed within her as the two constituent yet always distinct elements of her identity as a woman. … Thus she turns herself into an object—and most particularly an object of vision: a sight.

Whitefield-Madrano says that she relates to this quote.

I don't. Sometimes I dress to look and/or feel a certain way, but once I'm dressed, I don't go around constantly surveying myself. And when I do feel that way, I hate it.

So I'm trying to figure out whether this is in fact a part of being a woman or identifying as feminine (and thus my not doing it is part of my being genderqueer) or whether the author maybe doesn't know what he's talking about or is exaggerating what he's talking about (by using terms such as "continually" and "scarcely avoid").

I'd love for people of all genders to comment on this. What is your gender? Do you constantly watch yourself and feel aware of your image of yourself most of the time? Do you think women or people who identify as feminine usually do that?

Ways of Seeing was published in 1972. In what ways do you think enforced image self-consciousness for women or people who identify as feminine has changed since then?

Comments

[cleverthylacine]

My knee jerk and probably misogynist assumption is that "those girls," the members of the cliques i could never understand, the ones who seemed to have Ambitions, are trapped by such a frame, but those independent minded folks who are reflective and authentic don't.

See this is why I get frustrated when people say that when you talk about this you're making up 'straw feminists'. I think the truth is that a lot of women, especially geeky and/or feminist women, feel that way (and also assume that there's a frame and a trap when there isn't).

Which DOES make life harder for femme feminist women. Because the truth is that even if nobody SAYS anything, there ARE these looks that you get when you show up to feminist/quiltbag/progressive events with your nails done, and/or with makeup on, and in feminine dress unless it's boho-hippie-deadhead style. (By which I mean if you show up in a skirt that looks like it's Deva Lifewear or from an Indian import show or a Grateful Dead show, you're fine, but show up in a lolita skirt or a pencil skirt or a miniskirt with nice socks or hose and pretty shoes on, not so much).

I actually wore jeans and sneakers a lot more when I was trying to "fit in" both at school in my younger days and in various feminist/queer/progressive groups. The truth is that while I wouldn't want to wear it every day I'm a lot more comfortable in a lolita dress and cute shoes than I'd ever be in sweatpants (except for cleaning house/working out/sleeping, which is what they were designed for originally). That's being myself, and the only reason I don't want to wear it to work is that I work in a hospital so it wouldn't be practical.

This is not to single you out as you do get that it's a knee-jerk and somewhat misogynist/classist opinion, just a comment on the people who say that it's not true that you're judged for dressing up, I actually REALLY APPRECIATE that you are willing to admit this bias. Also? Yes, totally, about not having time to worry about it. The other reason I don't dress like that for work is that even I don't want to try and put on all of my lovely drag (well actually for me jeans, heavy boots and a leather jacket are drag, and I sometimes enjoy that a lot, but never mind) at 5:45 AM and try and get out the door to be in Oakland by 8.

But yeah, my real inmost SELF is not what I wear to work to type manuscripts at work or clean the cat box at home. It's what I wear when I want to have fun and be around people I trust to accept me.