Are you two-faced?

[firecat]

I made some comments about this in someone else's journal (the entry is friends-locked, so not identified) and it got me to wondering.

If you have a problem with how someone behaves--

• Under what circumstances do you tell them?
• Under what circumstances do you not tell them but tell other people who know them?
  
  • If you tell others, do you care whether those comments to get back to the person?
  • If you want that not to happen, do you do anything to prevent it?
  • Do your prevention mechanisms work?
• Under what circumstances do you not tell anyone (or only one or two confidants)?

If someone has a problem with how you behave--

• Under what circumstances do you want to be told?
• Under what circumstances do you not want to be told?
• Do you think people say things behind your back that are different from what they say to your face?
  • If so, does this bother you?
  • If it bothers you, do you do anything about it?
  • What do you do?

Comments

[marykaykare.livejournal.com]

I try never to say anything behind a person's back I wouldn't also say to their face if necessary/advisable/possible. I have, apparently, what is known as a 'speaking countenance' (i.e, everything going through my head is writ large on my face) so it'd be futile to try anything else.

I am always interested to know what people are saying about me behind my back. It is, after all, news on my favorite topic. And as dear Oscar said, the only thing worse than being talked about is not being talked about.

MKK